Real talk, lately I’ve been super frustrated in a couple of areas of life. I’ve been put in a few situations where I was told, or told myself, that I needed to just back off and not say anything.
I was left to stand here feeling like I was choking, feet stuck in the concrete. Like legit, uncomfortable as fuck from not saying what was on my mind or for not opening up the conversation… No matter how tough that conversation may or may not have been if I had.
Yes, I believe there is a time and a place for certain conversations… but I still believe they need to be had. If something is on your mind or in your heart, you need to talk about it.
This is something I adopted in my life as the normal a couple of years ago. It was not easy, it still isn’t always easy but it has proven to be an effective way to not only survive but fully THRIVE in all areas of my life.
Until a few months ago I still wasn’t doing this in my romantic relationship like I should. I kept it inside because I didn’t feel like I could say anything. I was always taught “He’s working honey, leave him be” mentality so that always replays in my head when I think about speaking up about what’s in my heart to say or ask or talk about. So I would swallow it down until I couldn’t contain it anymore and then it was usually too late.
Flash forward to now and it’s just a common practice for me to communicate what I’m thinking, wondering or feeling. No more holding back.
I’m not brash about it. I’m not condescending about it. I’m not overbearing about it. I consciously speak from a place of sincerity and compassion and pure authenticity and love.
Once you start practicing that in ALL areas of your life, it’s like breathing for the first time in 100 years. It’s like a gigantic release. It’s a brilliant way to get what you want out of different situations in your life and you wonder why you didn’t start doing this sooner.
You didn’t because it’s scary. Being raw and open is uncomfortable and leaves you exposed to potentially get hurt… but what if you just stay closed up and don’t take a chance at all? How much will you miss out on while you stay safe behind that wall you’ve created?
When you start being open and honest, you make that your new normal. You don’t want to begin to think about going back in the other direction because of how it may keep you stuck. And fear goes from what might hurt you to what you MIGHT MISS OUT ON.
Lately, I’ve been standing here keeping my mouth shut because I thought it might be the right thing to do. But here’s the thing, IT FEELS TERRIBLE.
I’ve fought so hard to make my life an open book and to make authenticity in its purest form be a part of my day to day that holding any of that back makes me feel like I’m a big fat liar and that feels terrible.
Here is the lesson friends, you have two choices… Be true to yourself and speak your truth OR hold it back, try to swallow it down and feel fake.
I don’t know about you but I will not waste the brain space and energy on holding back any more, it’s not worth it.
It attracts so much more negativity into your life. Holding back opens the door to self doubt, fear, uncertainty, assumption, resentment, and all kinds of other destructive thoughts that you certainly do NOT want in your space.
And if you think it’s not blocking other things in your life, you’re sadly mistaken… It’s all connected!
So I choose to be true to myself and be open no matter what. I ask the universe every morning to fill me with the words I’m meant to speak and to give me the courage to share those words. And in my next breath I ask that those words reach who needs to hear them the most. This is no different than sharing my message with all of you. The words and thoughts are put into me for a reason, TO SHARE.
So I will do just that and so should you. All you can do is hope that it’s received well and that maybe you can help guide someone out from behind their own wall of fear or whatever else they may be carrying around with them. Hope that you’re open-ness will spark that in other people and will help them feel lighter.
Be the change friends. The world needs your courage and light.